Since I am currently writing my thesis during the day, I find I am less inclined to come home and write on this here blog. Hopefully I will be able to satisfy my legions of fans until July when I will be more interested in writing. Until the next time I feel obligated to write anything, I leave you with the following updates/observations.
I will begin by saying that I have decided to grow a thesis beard. Specifically, I will not shave until my thesis writing is complete. There are a number of reasons for this decision. First, thesis writing is like the playoffs of a graduate degree. Secondly, looking in the mirror will be a constant reminder of how lazy I am. If I had finished my thesis sooner, I wouldn't look this bad. This should provide extra motivation for finishing as soon as possible.
Finally, the thesis beard will allow me to officially be better than Sidney Crosby at something. He has millions of dollars, is a world-class athlete, and is well-spoken. I am none of these things. But at least for the next few years, I can still grow a better beard than him. Sure, I assume I am better at mathematics and computer science than he is, but I don't know for sure. He may just be hiding those skills. However, concerning beards, I have him beat. At least for now.
A second update: I have run out of toothpicks. When I arrived in Edmonton 20 months ago, I purchased 500. Today, I ran out. Considering that I did not spend that entire time in Edmonton, I am guessing I am going at about a toothpick per day pace. Make of that what you will.
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10 comments:
You republican bastard. If you just used a re-usable plastic toothpick like the rest on the 21st century, you wouldn't have killed an entire tree (branch) for those 500.
preara - the practice tiara you're given before the real one.
I eagerly await your next riveting update, although I am not sure what could top your toothpick usage stats.
why must all the replies focus on the useless toothpick rant when he so previously well executed a meaningful paragraph on his thesis beard? I'm interested in talking about that. What is a thesis/playoff beard exactly? Can you illuminate some facts on that.
I strongly disagree with the comments of anonymous. I feel that the crux of the blogs' thesis lies with the aforementioned toothpick molestation and that is what should be debated in the comment section.
This man's flagrant (fragrant) disregard for the environment is appalling. He brazenly and offensively boasts of his exploits in wasting dentelumber.
caugor- a calcified cougar.
We were need to derive the relationship between toothpicks and the notion of this 'playoff beard'. They are both entities that relate in some way, shape or form to the facial cavity of the individual. Toothpicks to be inserted orally and the beard encompassing the mouth.
stser - commonly mispelled usage of the term 'sister;
I would like to state that anonymous' comments are a grossly oversimplified correlation. Simple mandibular locality is an extremely pedantic argument thesis. The deliberate juxtaposition of hirsuitism and eccological pedophilia is designed to create a false locus of control. It is clearly evident from the author's text that he (she?) believes that his actualization can never be realized if he maintains a degenerative oral fixation.
trigza - a trigger shaped like a pizza slice.
Quick Point here- correlations are relative, just like everything else.
dargi- an acoronymn for deranged.
Parts of Rick's anatomy that are not toothpicks: his thunder thighs.
Also, he looks like a hobo already.
I certainly agree with the thesis beard in principle. Bragging about being able to grow a thicker beard than Crosby, though, is like bragging about the fact that you were born first. Way to be born before he was. When you're 90 and you die first and he's 87 and he's still alive, he'll be bragging about that on your grave.
Also, I'd like to point out that 'well-spoken' is a matter of opinion. I think the guy hasn't said a single important thing to the media in his life. On the subject of toothpicks, don't listen to those tree-huggers out there. Wooden toothpicks are the shit.
Who are these guys TF and Paul? Anonymous and I have been having illuminating conversations on sustainable evidence of correlations attempting to devise the underlying meaning of the original post...please stay on course of the subject.
toolycne- penicilne used for tools
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